Lisa's Divorce Journal

 Going from friendly to ugly It's been 33 days since I arrived in Utah from Arizona. A lot has changed. On Tuesday I will start my third job. Hopefully, it will be the last one. I signed up for shipt, it's a shopping job, that I can do on my days off for a little extra cash and after what I did yesterday, I'm going to need it. Let me start by saying that my little family has been through two major life events since I moved in with them. I won't go into details, let's just say, neither event was pleasant. My soon-to-be-ex didn't ask how everyone was handling it, not really, he just commenced to calling the one in question an idiot. Which pissed me right off. How many mistakes had he made that I overlooked or helped him through? I told him he was an idiot for wrecking our marriage and one day he'd wake up and realize what a catch I was. He had the nerve to say I'd do the same. Wake up and realize he was a catch? He cheated more than once and lied to my fac...

 It's ok to be sad For the last two nights, I had dreams about Gene. It's not fair that my subconscious misses his body. I don't know if it's my brain telling me to slow down and give my heart time to heal. We may have lived mostly separate lives for the last three years while he was working out of the country but my heart was still all in this marriage.  I didn't imagine it was going to hurt this much. Or maybe it's just the idea of the loss that hurts. Any time I talk to him I am reminded of why not being with him is such a good idea. I reckon I just need a good cry. It's a good way to cleanse yourself of bottled-up emotions.  I started talking to two different men this week from FB dating. One had to be blocked after just one conversation. He wanted to show me his man thong, that he was wearing. The other, well I think he is going to want to move things along a lot faster than I am ready for. I think I will take down my profile and give myself time to hea...